To The Mom Never In Photos
To the mom who captures all the moments… But isn’t IN them
I see you.
I feel you.
I was you.
It was easy before kids. We’d take turns taking photos of each other. We’d have strangers take photos of us together. We’d take the odd selfie (it wasn’t as big back then).
Then that sweet bundle of joy arrives…
You want to document that sweet button nose… Those sweet pouty lips… Those sweet chubby cheeks.
(Insert 1000+ photos of the baby here)
Stereo-typically speaking (calm down, I know there are exceptions to this rule), along the way, moms seem to do a good job at capturing moments. The smiles… The laughs… The cute moments… The milestones.
But, she’s not usually captured IN those moments, is she?
No, she’s usually behind the camera (or, phone, more likely).
To some extent, this was me…
I vaguely remember thinking “why do I have photos of my baby with everyone except me?”
But I didn’t fully realize it until one faithful day.
Our son’s 4th birthday party. We invited lots of friends – friends of ours, his friends from playschool, and all the cousins. It was at a bowling alley. There were so many people they opened up the wall in the party room to create one large room.
He had a blast. His little cheeks were bright red from running around non-stop with his friends.
He had the Angry Birds cake he wanted. We served pizza and cotton candy favors.
I was 6 months pregnant with our daughter and I was tired (parties drain introverts as it is).
But, I still documented the heck out of that party. 148 photos, to be exact.
I can’t take all the credit, I gave hubs the camera too; he likely took 50 of those.
Afterwards, while looking through all the photos… I noticed… I wasn’t in ANY of them. Not even one.
Every single guest was documented… With the exception of me.
No worries, I thought. I asked all the guests to send me the photos they had taken.
Still, NOT EVEN ONE included me.
There is ZERO evidence I was ever at my child’s birthday party.
I pictured my kids looking back as adults and wondering if their mom was ever there for them (a tad dramatic, I know).
But, THAT was the exact moment I decided things needed to change.
I sat down with hubs and told him how disappointed I was. I needed him to make sure I was included in photos taken – at least to some extent.
Some will say “But they should just know” but sometimes life happens and things get forgotten.
Since then, he’s done a pretty great job. He even snaps photos of little tender moments when I don’t realize.
So to the mom never in photos…
Don’t be afraid to speak up.
Don’t be afraid to REMIND.
Don’t be afraid to hand that camera off.
You get yourself in there, mama!!!
*I recognize and appreciate that families come in all varieties. Some have two or more moms. Some have no moms. This article is simply sharing my personal story and speaking stereo-typically to the moms who are never in photos. 😉
